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Saturday, January 19, 2013

Nearly Three Decades

Next week I am going to be twenty-nine years old. Twenty-nine. I've spent the last week or so reflecting, in what little time I have to reflect, on my life as a twenty-something. There has been nearly nine years of this life, and I don't think a single year of it was calm. It hasn't been a bad ride, but I would definitely say it's been comparable to a bustle through a big city.

1. I moved from Kaukauna to Neenah with the love of my life. We moved into a duplex in what I would refer to as the ghetto. If Neenah actually has a parcel of land that would meet the definition of a ghetto, this was it. We made it out alive and even got to witness a major drug bust. I would classify this as momentous. Don't do drugs.

2. I bought a puppy. Her name is Lexi. She will be nine in July and is just as much of a pain in the ass as the day we brought her home. Damn dog.

3. I changed positions at work (four times actually in my 9+ year tenure). I anticipated being bored after five or six years, but I decided I really liked the company and stayed. They like me too...I think.

4. I met and cared for an old lady in our little Neenah hood. She liked chocolate and puzzles, but more chocolate than puzzles. That woman could pack more chocolate in her face than anyone I know and all the while she was consuming it would bitch about getting diabetes. "You're too old for that shit," I'd tell her. She'd eat more chocolate. God rest rest her crazy soul.

5. Neenah sucked. At least where we lived did. We moved to Appleton where I (we) purchased our first home. We had awesome neighbors. We drank a fair amount. We loved life. We'll never buy a fixer upper again. Word of advise (from my father in-law), "If it has a VIN or an address, it will ALWAYS cost you money." I don't know if I have it verbatim, but it was something like that. He could not be more right. He's actually always right.

6. I got pregnant. No, it was not an accident. I'm gay, for those of you that don't know. That shit was accomplished turkey-baster style.

7. I gave birth and then adopted my own daughter. If it sounds fucked up, it is. If you want to the story, start at the beginning of this blog.

8. My partner made a career change. I supported her hind end through school. She owes me big time. That's why she's supporting me through school now. Ugh.

9. My partner got knocked up. Better her than me this time. She was lucky enough to not puke her brains out the entire time. She gave birth. It was nuts. I have son.

10. I adopted my son. I know more about Wisconsin adoption laws than I care to. How many twenty-somethings can say that?

11. I wrote a book. It's a children's book, but it's still a book. It will be published this year. Then I will write more and I will publish more. You all will like, buy, and read.

12. I earned a promotion at work. I earned this promotion after passing it up the first time it was posted because I told myself I was uneducated. Other people told me I was uneducated. I am NOT uneducated. I am self-educated. I am getting my institutionalized education, but damn it, I have built a fantastic life for myself and I did not do it on stupidity. I did it on strength, intelligence, and determination.

13. I sold my first house and bought a second house. I do not know many of the neighbors, but I do know I love the neighborhood. I love the granola-ish vibe it throws. I love the trees and the parks that it is close to. I miss the old neighbors, but we aren't that far away. There are probably a lot of Subaru cars here.

14. I lost people I love. Let's leave it at that. Otherwise I will cry.

15. I'm getting educated. I attend this thing people call "higher education" nearly full time now that my partner has graduated with her R.N. And I work full time. And I'm raising a family. And I'm not sane. At least I'm bulletproof.

16. I fostered boxer dogs. I'd like to do it again when I am done with school and the kids are a bit older and the yard is fenced in. Give me five years and I'll be cleaning up shit for something I'll never own. #payingitforward.

17. I became a foster failure. I am the owner of an obnoxious, eighty pound boxer boy. I adopted him even after he destroyed our first house. He's a lucky dog. I'm a lucky girl.

18. I canceled cable. What. A. Joke. What a money suck. What a waste of time. I think I will do homework instead. Oh, kiss off! It's fun.

19. I've become annoyingly loud about gay rights. Just wait until I hit my thirties. I'll probably be louder. Perhaps, if I didn't have a family that was directly affected, I'd keep my mouth shut. See #s six and nine above. Then perhaps read the rest of this blog. Oh...and I came out.

20. I started this blog. I am madly in love with this blog. This blog allows me to be open and vulnerable. For those of you that know me personally, this is something I never am.

I did not do all of these things alone. I did them with my partner, my wife, Sara. I am proud of my accomplishments and of the life I, we, have built. I have one more year left in my twenties. My gut says I'll be spending it being schooled by those that "know better than me." Guess I better buckle up.