Search This Blog

Friday, July 1, 2011

Back to Square One

Now I swore after a month with a wailing infant that I would never have more children. No way. No how. I mean, really, why would I? Graiysn's birth didn't go just the way I wanted it to. We barely got to hold our baby after she was born and that continued after we brought her home. She was so jaundice that she spent weeks on a BiliBed at home. It was not a great experience, but it was our experience so we managed.

The saga with our infant continued when she grew just a bit older out of being jaundice and into being a colicky, screaming nightmare. When I say that she cried for twelve hours a day and slept for twelve hours at night, I do not exaggerate. There is no class, no parenting book, no words of advice that can help with colic. It just needs to pass and that's it.

So why would we even consider having having another baby? I don't know the answer to that. I do know that I learned to be grateful for what we were given. There is an absolute (and not the vodka) reason she was picked for us. Besides, I've always wanted a family with two children, a few dogs, some fish, maybe a bird or two, a loving spouse, and a constant flow of coffee and wine. I wanted to be surrounded by all the beings I loved and that loved me back. And, in the grand scheme of things, we were and are truly blessed. We were delivered a relatively healthy baby. She didn't have to spend any time in the NICU. She was a little early, but alive and she had fully functioning, very well developed lungs.

We really do want to expand our family. In fact, we were so eager to expand our family that we decided to settle on another dog. We foster boxers for the local Boxer Rescue and have had in our recent care a big, bouncy, destructive, young man named Abbott. He annihilated our kitchen several times. He was adopted and returned three days later. He was a lovely terror. Sara and I worked so hard to rehabilitate  that Abbott dog. He eventually mastered all of his commands with the exception of "down." He got along with our boxer girl, Lexi, famously, and he and Graisyn displayed the ideal amount of annoyance with each other. This is it! He was staying! End of story. Our family is now complete.

Nah! Sara and I are going to start trying for baby number two in a year or so. The donor we used for Graisyn appears to be unavailable. Apparently his supply has been depleted. We've selected three donors to request additional information packets on. Ladies and gentleman, get out your checkbooks. This is going to be pricey, but, hey, at least we get a discount on the adoption of this one. It's not quite the buy one get one philosophy, but it's something. Maybe this one will ring up at about $8,000 instead of $10,000.

Sara and I are excited to try for another child. In fact, I am really excited. This time it will be her instead of me. Don't worry doll, I will pray that you don't get morning sickness and hemorrhoids. I will pray that if you must have morning sickness, it be mild, for throwing up your breakfast and sometimes your lunch is not only aggravating, it can also put you on the verge of wetting yourself. I will hope to the stars that your experience is wonderful; that you will be pregnant and healthy and that you will glow.

In the meantime we wait and prepare. We will research donors. We will save our pennies. We will give our lawyers a heads up. Here we are back at square one and all in the hopes of one more squirmy, screeching, human being. Donations? Anyone? Hello? Okay. I kid, but it was worth asking.


  1. Yay! I love new babies! By the way, have you ever seen "The Kids Are Alright" about two teens who try to contact their sperm donor 'dad'? Just watched it with Corey, and couldn't help but think of you and Sara, but only because you are the only lesbian couple I know, lol.

  2. We did see that movie. How's the pregnancy going? That baby will be here before you know it!